Hmm, reflections.

So, I used to think I couldn’t sleep with out my own pillow. Or my own clean sheets. Being super sweaty most of the time used to really bother me. I used to think I needed hot showers. I don’t want to sound like trite missionary girl, but when you don’t have stuff, you realize you don’t really need stuff. Having nice smelling sheets isn’t always an option. And so you deal. When you are asleep you don’t notice the smell of your sheets. A cold shower feels really amazing after a day of being super sweaty. And bathing from a pila (large cement trough) by candlelight is pretty romantic. I’m not saying I never want to take a hot shower or sleep in a comfy bed again. I’m saying our needs are not always what we think they are. This week I learned I need either a hat or a hairbrush. It’s not totally essential to have both… but one is important. I left both of the aforementioned items in San Salvador and have been trying to get by. It has been a little sketch. But I don’t have a mirror… so that makes life easier.

Lately I’ve also been thinking a lot about how life is found in the middle of crap. I’ve had my share of tragedy in my life, and always before I’ve felt like when really bad stuff happens, life stops. But now I’m rethinking that theory. Two weeks ago my nephew, Jacob Ruben Zuniga, was born. The week before two brothers from one of the church’s communities were murdered on their way home. There was a bus accident with nine fatalities. The FMLN candidate for President’s son was murdered in Paris. Hundreds of people were displaced in the area I work because of flooding. Huge fires were raging in California. Jacob was born into a country where 10 people are murdered daily. But he was born. Life was found in the middle of a bunch of crap. One of my favorite people, Heather, thinks that life comes out of crap. Lets think about that through my compost metaphor: take a bunch of trash, put it somewhere and watch it turn into rich, beautiful soil. Watch life come from crap. I don’t know, it’s a new concept for me. What do you think?

This week I learned how to use a cuma. Its kind of like a machete, I cut weeds around my cucumber project with it. I couldn’t feel my right arm after 4 hours of mano de obra (labor). After spending a few weeks in the city taking care of Amy and baby, I’m back in my pueblo in the campo. Amy wound up having a c-section, so her recovery time was longer, but she is up and around now and everyone is healthy. Jacob is the new love of my life (see attached pictures). He was born beautiful, intelligent, and perfect. Its nice to be back in the campo, the hustle and noise of San Salvador gets to me after a while. But it’s a balance thing, because I get a little lonely out here. I have a great family and really fun co-workers, but it’s hard to develop those really sustaining friendships when you don’t have an amazing grasp on the language.

Here’s what I like: drinking really cold coke out of the bottle and eating quesitos (imitation cheetos), fresh squeezed orange juice in plastic baggies, fertilizing plants with lonbris-compost (worm poop), napping in hammocks, and black sand beaches. Here’s what I don’t like: clapping in church and the smell of burning garbage, oh yeah, and dirty chuchos (stray dogs).

So friends, that’s where I’m at. I hope this finds you healthy and happy.

Peace,

Audrey